8/24/2007 - "But it’s not French!" The Gendarmerie Subaru that caught us on Day Two of the 2007 DeGrisogono Londino Transnational Automobile Tour. A closer look once at the Auxerre Police Station revealed the hood scoop of a quite-unexpected Subaru WRX.

To say Team Polizei Master Pilot Michael Ross and I were shocked would be an understatement, but our story became even more bizarre once we met the Gendarmes face-to-face. Prepare for the most surreal Team Polizei vs. Real Polizei interaction of all time…

Ross and I - leaving Paris on Day #2 of the 2007 Londino in a relaxed mood befitting this most mellow of driving vacations - were proceeding south on the Autoroute A6/E60/E15…

Click Image for Google Maps Detail
(Above: The approximate location of our capture, in the vicinty of Auxerre.
Below left, Michael Ross at the wheel. Below right, I - Alex Roy - scan the road ahead.)

Even at a safe cruising speed of 119mph/190kph - and, since we were on vacation, lacking any of the standard Team Polizei police evasion and ECM gear - I easily spotted the small blue sedan parked ahead on the right, perpendicular to traffic. I foolishly assumed - from what I considered to be my expert knowledge of French Police vehicles - that even if it were the Subaru Impreza sedan I presumed it to be, that we could proceed safely.

"Alex?" Ross said over the roar of wind. Just as I was about to issue a precautionary warning, our Valentine 1 Radar/Laser Detector - the one device we had brought for just such an eventuality - issued the one alert for which it is too late to react once emitted:

The dreaded laser warning.

Ross slowed, but we both knew it was too late. They had logged our 190+kph speed - at least 60kph over the limit - the instant the alert had gone off. By the time we passed them at a leisurely 120kph, their gendarmerie livery hilariously clear, I saw the driver lower his laser-equipped binoculars and put the WRX into 1st gear to pull out behind us.

We immediately removed our white leather Team Polizei "Svenska Motorvag Polis" jackets and stowed them behind our seats. Our (hopefully) new friends then led (i.e. escorted) us to the Auxerre branch of the Brigade d’Intervention Rapide - French for "High-Speed Intercept Unit" - where Mr. Ross was quickly shuffled inside whilst I stood in the parking lot with the off-duty Gendarmes…all very impressed with my good friend’s Z8…

…after which the friendly Gendarmes brought me inside to show off some quite fascinating framed documents proudly hung from the wall by their desks…

…beside which they had proudly created a picture wall depicting 40 years of glorious Gendarmerie mechanized technology…behold! The Renault Alpine! And a Renault Alpine! And a Renault Alpine! And yes! Another Renault Alpine!

Alas, all was not always so glorious, for below we have the…er…Renault 21…unlikely to catch anything better than…another Renault 21.

But the blight on the Auxerre Brigade d’Intervention Rapide’s arsenal was ultimately made right by the following picture, depicting several fantastically well-dressed Gendarmes beside yet another Renault Alpine and a Citroen DS!

Delighted at my interest in their picture wall, the Gendarmes - having now finished issuing Mr. Ross what turned out to be the first-ever speeding ticket ever given to a Londino driver - gave us a tour of the police station and posed for pictures in the parking lot.

Just in case you thought I made this all up…see for yourself.

Mr. Ross, now ready to take a break from driving, then allowed me to complete the stage, yet although I was clearly better dressed, it was he who garnered the most attention of our new Swedish friends…the two girls from Stockholm in the A5.

As for the rest of the story…my full Londino wrap-up is still in the works.

But I remain innocent. I swear. They were taken. Both of them.